I just think it would have been nice to have had some information. I don't think that the people in charge were very considerate (understatement!). There were so many things that were done "incorrectly" (to put it kindly) and they caused stress and anxiety and a whole LOT of worry. It was hard to take it seriously knowing it was all false and a product of abuse.
It was very hard to understand the attitude of those in authority; it defied every understanding I had of what I knew to be true. It destroyed my automatic trust in people I formerly would have trusted to do the best for people, not intentionally destroy them. I never think of hurting people as an objective, so I don't expect it of others; it was an unbelievable shock to find out that several people would conspire to put so much effort into trying to paint me into seeming like the most terrible person on Earth, instead of my natural altruistic inclinations. It was so difficult having terrible things said of me and I was unable/prevented from responding in my own defense. It hurt deeply. I could not understand why I was treated as if I were vile and unfit for decent society. I was a pariah in the worse sense of the word; I was made to feel that I was despised/hated. I was told over and over that the person I most admired and held in high esteem hated me and wanted nothing to do with me and never wanted to see me again. I had no allusions about what he thought about me, but I knew he was kind and spiritual and a person of depth and character and who would never treat another human being horribly the way I was treated by the people who instigated the absolute nightmare against me. They seemed to do all the ugliness against me without a care, or sense of remorse. It felt as if they intended to have me feel the fullest impact of terror as possible. I had held respect for judges, so when I was excoriated and treated so badly with nothing even remotely resembling law by 3 of them, I felt myself sinking into despair and hopelessness. It was like an evil magician had waved a wand of cruelty and confusion over everyone and good became bad and bad was considered good.
The people who did this had no regard for kindness, honesty, or truth. They also treated the person (my doctor) who had his name put on the paperwork by them, to make me think he did it to me to show me his disdain and dislike of me; it bothered them that I would only believe it from my doctor's own mouth; it never happened. They showed my doctor no respect and in fact, not only did they treat him like a puppet, they lied in the paperwork that was attributed to him and they forged his signature. It was disgraceful! They stole his identity each time they forged his signature. The things they did under his name could have put him in legal jeopardy. All the forging of his signature (stealing his identity) could be used to steal his belongings and not leave a witness.....
The people who did this to myself and my doctor are criminals and should pay for their crimes. They have no remorse and are now attacking me medically and have terrified me so much I cannot trust them with my care at all. They are awful people! I believe they want me dead.
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