I knew what was real and was not, but the brutality was completely unkind and over-the-top. It was evil and intense. They are evil and intense. I am stronger and I have have integrity; I could never hurt another human being. Even those who hurt me, but I do warn others about them. No one should go through the torment I experienced. It tore through me like a relentless saw blade on full power. Fighting emotional pain and the physical pain and the confusion and the anger and such sadness that went on and on each and every slow dragging day for over 3 years has been excruciating. There were many times that I felt dying would be my only relief.

It has been a testament to my fortitude and faith in the one I so love and praying each night as I looked at the moon creating magical moments on the ocean waves.

It has been so horribly difficult.

It cannot ever happen to anyone else. I am deadly serious about that.