I had said before I should not worry what you think about me, but then I think I have written something that is confusing and with worry. I guess so many worrying things going on has me on edge. That is why I try hard to relax. I still think about that unemotional comment by the doctor. I was thinking about it and I realised that I have gotten so much verbal abuse from the people associated with the "thing" that I kind of learned to shut down to keep myself from saying angry things back. I knew they were looking for me to seem volatile to be thought of as dangerous, or something. It took will power to have that judge to have everyone leave and then just reamed me out with threats and insults. I did pass out and the next day my face was covered in hives. That asshole attorney got 2 inches from my face and screamed that you hated me and he could make it go on forever. What a Nazi!
It was not going to stop me from loving you, nor would jail......nor anything else.