TASTAP

 Look, I am operating under the worst conditions possible; I think they are torturing and abusing you around the clock and it hurts me so much I can barely sleep, or relax. It is HELL! I want to drive to you and break in and rescue you more than anything at all. Yet, I feel ignored and purposely so as if in anger. I could be wrong, but I don't know that. All I know is this could have been over by now and that hurts too.  Each day, I have to live with the way you seemed to hate me and I don't know why except you were trying to save yourself from their anger, or save them from being in trouble and making me the jerk instead. I asked for you to be there, as if I would ask for someone to be there if I thought they would hurt me. I am fighting a bad record now. People can see it and look down on me; even my own son; do you think that, as a mother, feels nice?

That woman uses people, so I doubt if she gives a shit about anyone , but herself. Why couldn't you have said, the woman who did this is mentally ill and needs help, instead of dumping it all in my lap? Is it because I was already so low, going lower would not hurt? WELL IT DID AND IT DOES! I actually wanted to die, I was so humiliated and heart broken! Is my life not as important as a murderous narcissist's? It was the lowest feeling, ever.  You didn't even have the guts to look at me. Do you know, you could go to prison for what you did? Instead I protect you by saying it was as a result of being an abused captive. You have become a part of a dysfunctional group and it has become comfortable to you. It is not normal and healthy. It is sick, twisted and perverted. You need rescuing and need therapy and I am not to be blamed; I AM ALSO A VICTIM! THEY ARE THE LOWEST OF CRIMINALS!