Forever loyal, forever faithful, forever in love.
Wednesday, September 30, 2020
Head clown
I think the stone crusher supp could be working. It made me spend Trump time on the throne, but well worth the effort. 🤡 "Come on man......clown.,.!" Anyone got some TP?"
❤️😱👸
Back at
He was put through 5 years of Hell. That was wrong. He could get a good attorney and get back at them, especially after the DA'S case. His choice, but I would back him. People as terrible as they will try again, if not punished. Normal people don't do what he (and she) has/have done.
Tuesday, September 29, 2020
Little Flower
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Sunday, September 27, 2020
Audio books
Pres. Obama wrote a new book and I got it on Audible. (But I just found out it doesn't come out until late November.) It was read by Obama himself! I am looking forward to it! I was listening to Michelle's book and it is sweet. She read her's too. I like that my son and his lady, Rocio listen to some book on tape before sleeping too.
I liked listening to Al Franken's book too. I never seem to finish one, before another good sounding one shows up. His self deprecatory humor is cute. I like it when people use it. Modesty coming from great people is sweet. (Like you.)
Saturday, September 26, 2020
Friday, September 25, 2020
Awful!
I feel as if I am invisible, like I created a terrible thing because I appreciated and loved you. I have been so reviled and I did not know why. I felt something was off, because I saw how they seemed to treat you so abysmally, but acted like you were exclusively theirs. Was I being blamed for something? Why? They seemed to want me to feel low and disgusting. I felt like someone was needed to be blamed. I wanted to shout at them, that I did not want anything, but the joy of being near you created. They just made me feel like a piece of filth. I have never understood what it was about. I resent the lies were told. My love had no ulterior motives. Strange how I only gave a few gifts and enjoyed seeing you at visits, but they created a entire gang of attackers and devious plans to harm me and smear my name and integrity.....funny for people who had the least amount of integrity in a collection of people of that size. I did NOTHING wrong, and yet they committed a load of crimes to set me up and punish anyone it affected. Awful people!
Emotional
I can't stand to be away from you. I had such a hard time. It is raw and painful all over again. It was done in such a cruel way. I was feeling numb and so sad. I suppose you never heard my messages. I basically offered my devotion, and support and cried and said that if you didn't want anything to do with me, I understood, but that I would always love you. I knew Something bad was going to happen after everyone acted so strangely. It would have happened ino matter how long I waited, but he knew I would call to ask about the surgery. I was also so relieved that I could call. It had never been fair to that point, I don't know why I should have thought it would be fair then. I was shaken up and was emotional. They treated me as if I were some creepy criminal. All I could think later that I never wanted to feel like a stranger to you again. I felt fresh grief. The people in charge did not know how much I genuinely loved you. I would never want you turned away from me, if you wanted to see me. Of course, I have no real idea of your feelings, or would never be so presumptuous, but I just know if I were so honored to have you care about me; it would be my piece of Heaven on Earth.
Fun
You won't stay away as long as "he" wants, will you? DO you want to come here? I hope you do. Nothing like what I am sure you are used to, but think of the ocean. I want to begin loving you asap. We could also have a treasure hunt for the things I bought for you over time.
I am looking forward to having fun and laughing with you. I want to blast serious crap into the Universe.
Sneak away, so they cannot stop you. Please?
My heart equals you.
xxoo!
I suppose not.
Thursday, September 24, 2020
Tuesday, September 22, 2020
Tater
I pulled out a small potato (from a pot) that I had grown from the peel. It was probably the most wonderful potato I have ever had. Maybe I am biased, but it was creamy and delicious.
HVM
Sweet Reality~
Moon's pale light gently
teases my softly closed eyes
I hold firmly to a vision of you
resisting the intrusion into my
joyful reverie
Your perfect face is all I care
to see
It became a tightly held
dream
from despair
when you disappeared
I live each day as if it were my first
day in exile
Tenuous grasp of a situation
I live in a dark mirrored mind
Confused
Ethereal and fanciful is a
defensive method of making
light the serious and getting
by on a gossamer thread of
surreal reality
It sustained me
I want so much to see you
again
and weave all my dreams and
fantasies into a reality of the
sweetness
of
you.
~Haviva
Saturday, September 19, 2020
Moonlight Stardust and You
Moonlight, Stardust and You~
I may never have the chance to hold
your face in my hands
your sadness in my arms
your joy in my life
I love you so much I could die
The pain hurts too much to live
I am no longer part of existence
Death is the only escape
Loving you was the breath to nourish
my soul
the light to find my way
the home I never had
You are gone and I cannot
reconcile it in my mind
grasp it in my devotion
bargain for it with God
You fused with me on a
spiritual plane
Talking was not essential
Conversations went on
for hours...they do still...
in mute solitude.
Somewhere exists,
a haven of love
I yet cannot see
until soaring back to the celestial
beginning....where I will again behold you
in the silvery streaming moonlight,
just there,
under flickering stars...
and in the warm joy of my embrace.
~Haviva
(c) HVM 2018
Friday, September 18, 2020
"So far away..."
Feeling cautiously better..... I just hope it continues.
"It would be so fine to see your face at my door..."
Strange times
You know that each time your signature was forged, your identity was stolen. You could charge each person with identity theft. MP did the forgery, but others used it. That attorney did and so did your partner. It is abysmal. There is something very scary going on. I think you knew I would help you. I will always help you.
Fire
Broke my heart to hear a fire fighter come to his home and find it burned to the ground. His sadness was so touching.
Thursday, September 17, 2020
Tuesday, September 15, 2020
Plot (Updated)
I need to sell a cemetery plot, but I am not sure how to do it. I need the paperwork, but I don't want to alert them to my wanting to sell. It also makes me feel bad.
It may be a moot point, because I may be the one occupying it. I have been so sick and in pain. I guess I will never see you again.
I love you forever.
Thursday, September 10, 2020
Wednesday, September 9, 2020
Apple Cider Vinegar
A tablespoon of Apple Cider Vinegar is supposed to help lower Blood pressure and blood sugar, etc. It is used in an 8 oz glass of water (etc) I am going to do it. I have so much of it that I have made. I usually put it in coleslaw, or salad dressing. I make it with Stevia instead of sugar.
Sunday, September 6, 2020
Cruel liars
Ethereal Agony~
My summer song of sadness
A river flowed despair
A fleeting voice of madness
that echoed through the air
Ethereal and magical
that perfect
love of mine
It felt so blessed
and special
as if by grand design
My heart and mind you
rescued
from a life that wasn't
there
You gave me warmth
and kindness
and breath of freshened
air
Eagerly I waited for
every
small encounter
lifting
spirits high
....then....you were
gone....
I managed on
tho breathing
turned to
sighs
I sank back into
nothingness
grasping
precious
memories
of
past desires
and picturing
your
dearest
face
now held by
cruel
L
I
A
R
S.
Haviva~
(c) HVM 2019
Friday, September 4, 2020
Thursday, September 3, 2020
Cutie
Do they beat you up, or drug you? Don't let them if possible. You were still awfully cute.
I wish I could have hugged you.
Look
Did you at all feel bad for me? I did for you. Thin and disheveled, you broke my heart. What has been done to you? That is not the way people who are loved look.
None
I will never hate you, nor believe you hate me. I am the one who loves you and speaks with your mother in prayer at night. I cannot be away so long. That is so wrong to do to a person.
W/O
If I were in that position, I would get away and be safe and then figure things out. I have an open door. It is yours too. That over-emphatic voice didn't fool me. But I feel like dying. Anyplace without you is not worth living in.
Only
I was only able to survive their cruelty thinking of seeing you again. Don't let them hurt you.
I hate morning for this kind of thing
That asshole attorney has a staff and unlimited resources to pull things together for him. I have me. I am not at tip top shape, I am tired and I HATE being somewhere in the morning! I feel delicate.
Wednesday, September 2, 2020
Poo poo be doop
I wish I had remembered to buy a stylish mask in time to go to the event. Something bejeweled would be nice. Believe me, the fire has not gone out of this Betty Boop!
I'm a fighter
If my friend is not there, I guess I will just let them do whatever they want to me. That judge doesn't like me. I am dead. (Nah!)
I don't matter anyway
I was looking at all the papers and getting confused about what to put in and I just shoved everything (of the current stuff) into a box and thought I could sort it at the hotel, then I just got so sad from it all; I thought, "maybe I should just go to jail and make everyone happy." I really don't matter, anyway, do I?
Extremely tired.
I am so tired. Extremely tired. I am disheartened. I am worried about my friend. I don't know what to do.
Tuesday, September 1, 2020
Temper
I guess my temper is a bit on vacation right now. I am tired of that attorney's shit. He is a massive jerk.
MP hacked your emails I would bet. Some sounded very unlike you. An employer cannot put you through this legally.
Twinkle, twinkle....
BTW, Star may have been nice to you, but not to me. She is a horrible person who treated me badly since she was under the direction of MP.
Damned Court!
Damned Court!
| 1:59 PM (2 minutes ago) |  | ||
| ||||
I am sorry, but I am handicapped and I have serious health issues like a breast cancer diagnosis and MS and am low income; are you seriously going to limit me on what I can do, after I have SUFFERED FIVE YEARS OF FALSE RESTRAINT that CAUSED my health problems? FIRST I am told to include Guasco, now, you say NOTHING at all! Is that representative of the COURT? So far the Court has allowed me to be BLATANTLY RAILROADED BY CRIMINAL actions while I have given evidence time and time again, and IGNORED! Even Dr. Lukaszewicz refuted the ENTIRE FARCE, yet I was STILL thrown into JAIL! How is THAT for justice, huh? Not MUCH AT ALL! I am being again dragged into court with CANCER in my body, and yet WHO CARES? Certainly not you! This is a DISGRACE!
| 2:31 PM (4 minutes ago) | | ||
| ||||
Have you never heard of saving paper? Five years of a LIE against me has made me just a "little" sensitive! I have had to sleep in my car at times! It costs me money to fight this! It helps me to email instead of going through papers in court, while my MS makes me not handle it well, makes me dizzy and nauseated and the cancer diagnosis makes me in pain! I have proven my case many times over, but Kaiser's deep pockets float Guasco along, while he lies to the court and submits forgeries as real! It is too much for even a person of normal health to withstand, much less a person with serious illness. I used to admire the justice system, but money has gotten in the way of a fair trial! Even if I had Kaiser money, I would not use it to buy a win! Sorry to burden the Court with TRUTH! I won't send emails or phone calls, if Guasco leaves Kaiser money and forgeries and lies at the office and out of the court! Cp
They should go to jail!
Someone who doesn't mind hurting the object of their desires, humiliating them and putting them at legal risk, does not care about that person! That is NOT love, or anything close to it! It is greed in many forms! The people instigating this, should go to jail!
They don't care!
I would seriously hate someone who used my name on legal paperwork to hurt other people and lie to the Court! Perjury is a serious crime, but they don't care who will be put into jail because of it! I guess it is all a part of the insanity that did this in the first place!
Who would put someone they say they want so badly, in legal peril? THAT SAYS IT ALL! They do not care about that person!
Serious Words from a HS Friend
Hello my good and faithful friends, it is me again after 20 days in Covid prison where I was in isolation from the rest of world, I am once again a free man!
After being released from the hospital the first time, I was only home 2 days before I suddenly fell ill. I was hit at the same time with Double Pneumonia and Covid-19...this time I went temporarily blind, my speech was slurred and pain in my hips and joints to the point that I couldn't get up or down from a chair.
I can now get up from the chair and move about ( although I still need my walker) and my eyesight is back and my speech is also back to normal...the Covid did do some damage to my lungs so I am on oxygen for the time being.
I'm gonna tell you again that Covid is not a joke nor a liberal hoax, it is a vicious disease that can ruin your life in a remarkably short period of time...Please take this seriously, think of other people (and not yourself) when you go outdoors and into public. WEAR A MASK all times outdoors. There is no excuse for not wearing a mask, do the right thing for all of us. I want to thank all of you who sent me prayers, good wishes and thoughts...It is good be alive and well once again
Panic attacks
I guess I have been getting panic attacks. I wake up feeling like I cannot breathe. I am so stressed. I hope you are okay.
Treated badly
I hurt for people who are treated badly. I hurt for my friend, who is so dear to my heart; my love will never die, even if I do.
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