Talk to me. I need to hear from you only.

Dercum's disease can be easily mistaken for a multitude of other diseases, especially in the elderly population, so a high index of su...

Doing a lot of reading on BC, but I need rest too.

I don't know what to do. I am not trusting entirely the K oncology team. They advertised integrative medicine, but it is nowhere to be f...

Newsletter #182 Lee Euler, Editor  Web Version  |  Subscribe  |  Back Issues  | Resource Center |  Feedback About  Cancer Defeated! ...

Changes of Life~ I reach to the depths of my primordial soul The mixture I find fills a a mutable bowl Could I belong in a pla...

I seem to have developed a strong sense of resiliency. I guess I have become so tired of dealing with panic and despair, I just refuse to ev...

Do you still want to be my friend? It would be the nicest thing ever.

I don't know if I will do okay with the cancer, or not, but I would love to see you. The doctor does not seem very well versed and certa...

I will try hard to get better, but I wish I had you to hug and feel like nothing could go wrong when I look into your eyes.

I spoke with the oncologist. Maybe I didn't get it all, but it didn't end with my feeling good about things. I feel like I left a b...

You've always made me so happy.

I am going to write a book and it will expose everyone who did this to me and to you. I hope they can withstand the fallout.

Amazing that a woman with cancer can't even find compassion, or a break.

I was beaten up because I cared about someone. I still do. I would protect him. I would die for him. I love him, no matter what. I will neve...

Don't ever let the crazies get you so down you allow them to get to you too much. You are so above them all. Don't let them keep you...

If I knew someone had been forging my signature, aka stealing my identity, I would file a complaint with my PD. Callous people who only care...

That K attorney lies so much he could out do Trump as the country's most prolific (and pathetic) liar. He belongs in prison, as well as ...

I hope you are getting enough rest. Lack of sleep makes me feel as if I am depressed, but a good rest gets me back on a better balance.

I go through a range of emotions, only because I have had cruel things said to me. But, when I see some things I take as signs, then I perk ...

I hope you still want to be my friend.

Sometimes I just write any thought that springs into my head. So much criminal wrong has been done and cruelty has been lavishly spread on ...

I only want to hear about my health situation from you.

To know how you are doing is everything to me, so this is very difficult. I look for signs any way possible. It's all I have and my pray...

You are loved.

I was told I would be taking oral meds in pill form. I have no idea. I will get my new form to sign and put in my chart. I want who I want....

I will work on the house tomorrow.

I hope that the waiting period will be over soon and you will see me. I will do anything to keep you safe and happy.  I repeat that a lot, ...

The MRI was a good experience and the people very nice. This pandemic scares me for you. I am scared for everyone, but my heart is with you...

I think that a-hole attorney wrote the police report and paid the guy to write it up as if he did it. He said he researched and saw I had be...

The MRI was pretty easy. They said they got clear pictures. I said, "so I still have something in there?" Not real imaginative hum...

I always have sadness hanging over me, but feeling you near, lifts me.

I am waiting for my renter outside Safeway. There is a man playing Spanish guitar. I love it. I want my renter to give him a donation for...

A white feather just came floating down to me. My guardian angel sign.

Always do what makes you happy, not what makes others happy. You have done that forever, your turn now. You are loved.

I hope that you and I can decide whatever we want for ourselves. Obviously, I want to be your friend and know you forever. I like people to ...

The "Mind body Connection" Audible book is pretty helpful. There were guided meditations to help give people more independent thin...

That horrible man said such ugly things to me about you. He is obviously not working for you, but for ....

Going in to the MRI. Will think of you to not be afraid. You are such a cutie. Keep me safe.

Keeping you safe and seeing you again give me the motive to live. I never want you to feel down.

You know I would do anything for you. You are the one I will love forever.

MRI 2 pm Thurs.

I cannot make my 8 am Pet-scan. I am so nauseated. Will come to 2 pm MRI. I am just keeping track as journaling.

I guess alone will be okay.

I had written 5 hundred, or more poems (for you) but I deleted around 100 of my poems because I thought they were embarrassing.I wish I coul...

I need help with this cancer thing. I feel alone.

I was just told that K removed my power of attorney for healthcare without my consent. They kept badgering me, but I said no. Then they just...

I read a police report of lies that was supposedly filed by my former doctor. Some of it is true and most of it is false. I am not even cert...

No one should have to worry about their safety in a place of healthcare, or anywhere, really. It is absurd! How is anyone supposed to feel s...

You have my unconditional love and support. You never have to face anything alone.

I guess I have become very jittery about K. Some of them must not be influenced by what they think I did, but I DID hear that bad things are...

I can't bring myself to go back to oncology or Dr. Z, or K. I don't want to be subjected to the cruelty and lies. Who should be sub...

K. May have some nice places there, but their doctors who have loyalty to a cruel narcissist and treat me like crap because she whined to ev...

I believe that the people attacking me and claiming "You're going to die, you're going to die!"  "You have spots on y...

Started listening to audio book, "The Mind Body Code" "How the mind Wounds and Heals the Body" by Mario Martinez Psy. ...

Are you able to leave an abusive place? It doesn't seem healthy to stay. The abuse can manifest in ill health. You don't deserve tha...

Remember when I was waiting for an MRI and I sent you a quote by Henry Rollins and you said, "I didn't know you were into punk rock...

I am going to go outside and give thanks for you and to keep you safe. 

I bought a bidet awhile ago, just never figured out how to install it. I put some of my supps under my tongue to get more benefit from the...

I made my version of sweet and sour chicken.  No rice. It's okay. I had ordered a case of pineapple awhile ago on Amazon (no sugar), but...

You are so very loved. Forever. Stay safe.

In my ever exploring the world of environmental alternatives, I bought from Amazon, SOAP NUTS! They are some kind of seeds that make natural...

I am sure this breast cancer issue is their opportunity to either kill me, or add more time to the R.O. or wait period. The timing is just t...

I want to sell my cemetery plots, pay off back prop taxes, so they don't go for a grab, buy an RV and run away to where twisted minds c...

I still have a substantial amount of storage clutter in the house and the kitchen is a renovator's dream, feel free to come here any t...

Have a sweet day. You are in  my thoughts.

You give me hope.

Please, no matter what our personal feelings turn out to be, let's band together and look out for each other, okay? I never want you man...

It just seems rather odd that Dr. Z did my exam and sent me off with a clean bill. Then a phone call from Dr. Z yelling at me that CANCER IS...

Where you work is an insane asylum. A well paid prisoner, where even the personal life is invaded. The only way to freedom, is leave. You do...

My heart only wants to love you and forget any bad stuff. I am tired of bad. I actually want to stop with anything to do with health, or te...

So much does not make sense that all I can do is have faith. It would devastate me to find out that the person who means the most to me, all...

Article re Dercum's. I do believe it is what I have. So, what I don't understand is what did it look like under the microscope? Canc...

Is it possible to be around a cruel person for so long, that cruelty now seems like normal behavior?

Harmful criminals need to be stopped.

I could never let someone I care about be tormented, even if my own safety, or comfort were at stake. I could never let anyone else suffer f...

When I love someone, I want their life to be as lovely as possible.

Some people have a variety of reasons why they think they are better than others and they think it is fine for them to hurt their victims, b...

I write my thoughts as they come to me, so I can feel better. This has been a very difficult time with very cruel people involved. I now hav...

I hope your night is restful and peaceful. Hugs.

I thought Dr. H would be better than the others, but even she said something ominous about tiny black spots on my lungs, making me worry, bu...

You can tell me anything. I feel that way about you. I have never lied to you and never will.

I don't understand restrictions remaining in effect when a person might have a serious health situation. It seems cruel even for that pl...

I write my bits of anger poems to relieve some steam. I would only say what you would approve in official situations, if possible. I think t...

I had said before I should not worry what you think about me, but then I think I have written something that is confusing and with worry. I ...

If I knew you thought about me as I do you, I could withstand anything.

I may have worded what I said incorrectly. I should have said I love you and then said I may really be ill from cancer.  I was not believing...

I would love to always know you are okay.

Reign of Terror~ I lived in agony and tormented soul The only way out was to be in control Before I could meld two halv...

Such a pretty day!

Doing little so I can stay rested. Doing all my supps full force (in nearly every orifice..... :-) ) eating small bits  drinking veg juice....

You are the happy thought I hold on to during the day to make me smile.

I hope you are well. Always sending up my support and caring energy to you.

Have a nice lunch time!

Dr. Raji Ayyar Dr.Raji Ayyar: After working as a renowned Oncologist at Kaiser Permanente, Santa Clara, CA for over 20 years, sh...

Haviva (@cherylpet) Tweeted: Yoga for cancer. https://t.co/IdapbTZY2V https://twitter.com/cherylpet/status/1242168303033991173?s=20

My former oncologist, Raji Ayyar, used to give me hugs after my appointment. It was nice. She also had me go to see Amma, when she was in th...

PET Scan Thursday. Ugh.

Got better sleep. It helps improve mood. Sometimes I actually feel sorry for myself, but I shake it off....until next time. I need integrati...

MRI Santa Rosa 2pm. Brain. It will be a good chance to see any MS involvement too.

I feel extremely depressed. I guess my ability to withstand the torture ran out. I am exhausted. They measured it just right.