I put posts that were supposed to go here in the poetry area. Oops!
I hope your day has been very nice.

I hope you are never angry with me. You mean so much to me. I keep the fun/lovely times in my memories.
I do the best I can. I am all alone, they have everything they can use....against one person. Such Bullies!

They caused any bad and are nonstop liars. Scary, desperate people.

My emotions go all over the place, but mostly sad.

I want to see that sweet look on your face again. I miss it so much.

I would love to go to Half Moon Bay with you. It is a place that feels special to me for many reasons.
You are very special to me.

Oranges are the best! One time I had a tertible cold, so I spent the entire day lying in the sun eating a bag of oranges. By the end of the day, I was better.

You belong around people who treat you much better, the way you deserve.

These are merely my thoughts. Please understand. It helps me to write them out. I saw your smile in my dream and I was so happy, then....I woke up.

Maybe I am no one to you, but I am suffering. I am a human being who is suffering so much.
That horrible man purposely planted a seed of doubt in my head, by saying it could go on forever. Who is that cruel?
I really never did wrong for this to happen. I got confused by the attacks and lies. This was so brutal. Why? Sounds like desperate prople involved. I don't like that. Please don't let them (or me) hurt your health, or stress you out. I love you so much, I don't want to add to your problems. I want to be your oasis, not your nightmare. Take what you know and I will trust you. It is so hard, because I don't know many to trust. You are the ONLY one I trust with my life. You can just forget me, if you want, but tell me, so I can be prepared. I don't think I will do well, but that's life. You bring out the best in me and sing sonnets to my soul. I would do anything to make you happy.

You know how much I trust you. Please dont let them hurt me again, please? I know you had a part in it at the beginning, but I don't hold it against you, but now, I suffer each day. I need to be able to hang on to knowing it will be over. I really wish it could be sooner. I get really so sad.

Some days like today, I get bad headaches and just sleep. Sleeping is happier than feeling so sad.

I wish I could have a small sign to make me feel happy.

I have been thinking about you a lot today. I think about how nice you were to me. It was fun when other people didn't insinuate themselves, as of you were their property. You know I would abide by what you say, not what other people say. They speak for you and I know they lie, so I cannot believe them. Hasn't enough time gone by for us to know what we want? Why is it anyone else's decision?

I wish I could be around for your birthday. I will be thinking of you.

You are my weakness. I would do anything for you.

They don't want me to know you any longer. That should be your decision as well as mine, but seeing my lack of choice in the matter, I defer to you.
You know how I feel about you. Nothing will change my feelings.
Be safe. Take care.
You are loved.

If I could hold your hand, I would die of happiness.

Have a wonderful evening! I hope you had a lovely day. I needed to do more, but ended up taking a much needed long nap. It seems everything needs to be cleaned. It gets so dusty here.
Macy's online had such great prices on some of their towels, I had to get some! I will have them for the (currently unused) bedroom. There are boxes in it now, but later for a dear one who would like to be here.  I will get it emptied soon, though. 

I am not trying to make things difficult, it is just that the "rug" has been ripped out from under me several times. That, along with cruel things said to me, has been terrible and unsettling. I do not know why it has all been done to me, except to discourage me, or for the fulfillment of sadistic pleasures of others. Whatever, it has been very odd. I am not sure what is known by everyone, but the end result was to have the absolute crap beaten out of me, so I would either die, or want to give up on the one I care about.

That is why I go on an emotional rollercoaster and seem very sad at times. The end date was left up in the air, which is supremely unfair/ illegal especially with forgeries and false "evidence" as their sole reasoning.

Please tell them it has been outrageously draconian and much too long. I am a human being who is hurting and being hurt from all the bad treatment and it should end now.
Thanks

I wanted to become friends, but their "hired guns" decided to make it more complicated, by baiting me and upsetting me and turning it into a legal thing.
It has not been pleasant, but I would do anything for you.
But, please, if you don'thi even want to be my friend, let me know and I will decide my future plans.
I am tired and very sad, so I have no big ideas. I just want to sit on the side of a mountain and become a part of nature.
You will be in my thoughts.

I miss you with everything in me.

 Have a fun, safe weekend.

Somehow, I hurt my arm and can't lift it. I think it was from emptying buckets of water I save for watering and flushing.

My son went to Washington state to my Godson's family cabin. It looks beautiful there. I am so glad my son has stayed close to my dear deceased friend's son. Last night I felt so sad, because I see no one except my renter, really. I do it to myself, not going anywhere, because I can't face going out.

Things are not nice any longer. I feel over, done.

Nothing fair, or just, involves cruelty, or not being told the truth, it is the antithesis of what our country is supposed to be about. Why is it allowed where you and I are involved, or potential danger to you? Does anyone care that it is eating away at me? Does no one care that each day I am in such despair that I feel barely alive? That I barely care about being alive? It touches no one. I guess I am nothing. It is how I have been treated for a long time now. The people around you have done this to me for a long time. Why? They must be quite evil. They must want to harm you. No one should do this to other people. Why are they allowed? They don't respect humanity, they must want what you have. I wish you had nothing, so they would leave you alone.
I would sell my home and take care of you, or just have you come live here and take care of you. It would be better than wondering if predators were going to take your identity and then harm you. I have no strings, no conditions, I just want you happy and loved. I felt so close to you. I hope it can happen again. The horrible man said you didn't want anything to do with me. I think he is self-serving, not thinking about you. He is cruel and he is a liar, and so are the people working with him, or someone he is working for to help keep you imprisoned. Why is this allowed? You have a loving home here, with no shackles, just love and concern. I am very worried about you.
 No one carries out plans like these for good intentions. Each day, I struggle not to want to die.

I wish I could talk to you.

My niece may have her baby on your birthday. That would be nice.

Talking to you was the best thing in my life. I think I would have given anything to keep doing it.
I still would.
I hope nothing has soured it. It hasn't for me anyway.
When I automatically smile thinking about it, I know it hasn't. It feels like suddenly getting a mental hug, or when everything converges and all feels right with the world, no matter the actual reality of it.
 From the weird, cruel things people have said to me, they don't know me and they don't know you, yet they force their lack of understanding in as if they did.
If people can make sweet and caring into ugly, then it says a lot more about them than it does about me, or about you.
Why are the feelings of other adults anyone else's business anyway?
How would they like it to be told how to feel, or who to enjoy?
They wouldn't.
It is one aspect that confused me the most about this thing, why grown people could not make their own decisions; why people felt the right to tell you what to do, like they owned you.
It scared me for your safety. It is such a foreign concept to me, that it still does frighten me for you. Maybe those are the "responsibilities", more than the obvious ones in a person's life.
Whatever it is, I know that I would risk anything and defy anyone to keep you safe.

If they don't understand why I love you, then they don't know love and probably never will.
They can turn me into the most despised pariah and beat me until I die, but I am the lucky one.

I got to know real love. I got to know you.

I got more members to my walking group. It breaks my heart.

The last time I was there, I just cried. I was so sad about what was going on with you.

I am trusting you. Trust me too.
I cannot live through more hurt.

I keep staying up late.
I wonder if you are even at work today. I have no clue what you do. It feels lost.

I have been adding Reishi mushroom in powdered form into my health ("dirt") shakes.
Remember? 😊

Good news about my friend with pancreatic cancer. When her doctor stopped the ALA infusions for a period of time, her numbers for the indication of cancer went radically back up. Since then, she went back on the ALA infusions and the numbers went back down! Now, she will not stop the ALA infusions....ever.
If you know anyone with cancer, or many other diseases,  they need to be on ALA. I am taking in on a regular basis, but I may go for some ALA infusions and vitamin infusions. Some places, I hear, only charge around $100 + to have done.

I want to keep myself healthy and I would feel privileged to keep you happy and healthy too, out of love.

My penance for falling in love was to be beaten up, despised and reviled. It has a Biblical feel of radical punishment. I don't condone it, but if it leads back to you, then so be it.
Maybe I have romanticized the truth, but I guess it feels better than merely calling it cruelty.
I love you too much to go back and moan about my suffering. 
I look to the future with love, hope and faith...
In you.

I mentioned to the HOA that it would be nice to have a veg garden, but they did not have the courtesy to answer me. One woman, from next door, said she loved the idea, but no one else said a word. I think she wants to make me feel as if at least someone likes me. She hugged me right in front of the window of the jerk man who had my cars towed away. Then, her partner was out there working on my car. It must have burned the mean man's butt.

I still keep basically to myself. I almost never go outside, except to take my dog out and pray from my deck at night.

Sleep well, my dear friend. I love you.

You are adored!

I watched a Netflix program called, "A Tale of Two Restaurants". It was heart warming. Now, I am attempting to was one about French gardens, but it is not loading well.
I like programs like those more than stories.

I am thinking of you and such a flood of warmth came over me...I had to smile. But,
I am so very sad because I miss you so much. I do believe I will see you again, because I trust you.
You make my life beautiful just by thinking of you.
But, I would much rather be with you.
I just got that stab of pain somewhere between my heart and stomach from missing you.
My emotions are everywhere.

If you cannot picture me ever being in your life, drop the thing, and I will never see you again. I will keep my word. I will still ask my guardian angel to keep you safe and keep you in my heart, but that is all I will do. I will give you your inheritence when I am gone, you deserve it.
I will always love you.

My nice neighbor, Paul, washed my car and buffed out a small spot where his partner backed into it. I told them it was not necessary to do anything, but they did anyway! They have been so nice to me, wish I could say the same for the rest of the people here!

Is it absolutely necessary to have this go for another year? It is hard living in Limbo.

You know I will never be angry with you no matter what the situation. I always will be supportive and caring.

It is easy to be nice to you.

I wish I could get rid of my sadness.

I hope you have a lovely Memorial day long weekend.
You are missed.

Good morning.
I awoke with a start and feeling so thirsty. It amuses even me that I eagerly look at this blog each day as if I think I am going to see an entry from you, when I know in reality that won't ever happen. I might as well be scratching with a stick on a prison wall. It was strange, because in jail I was allowed nothing. At first, all I saw were someone's notes on the wall, like their notes for a business meeting that had been inconveniently been interrupted by the blip of being jailed. (how did they rate a marking pen, or did they find an extraordinary hiding place?) Dried blood on the floor was what? The realization that freedom would come too late? An attempt to be removed to another place?
I welcomed the books I was given. I devoured them instead of the food...a small act of defiance.
Why did some think I wanted drugs? I barely take an antihistamine without extreme necessity.  The ER doc seemed to think it was what I wanted when I worked so hard on my beautiful wood floors to ready the house for sale to interlopers and was overwhelmed by the fumes and strained muscles that rendered me temporarily paralyzed. No one cared about me, they believed what they were told to believe, while pasting a mask of compassion on their faces.
It is some of what I have endured for my love for you. The time away has been enough for a war, or a family of three children to have been produced.
To say I have had the shit beaten out of me is to be conservative. I now live in a prison of my own making....and you are still gone.

Notes of Love-

Music is your voice
in my ear
That reverberates
In my lonely
heart
a solitary sweet
note
of love and desire

How long must one
suffer
In despair and longing
Until the end is
released
as a dove from
its cage

Is it arbitrary
or by design?

Passionate devotion
turns reverie
Into daydreams
and reality into
Avoidance

Truth becomes an
abomination
to a lover's soul

Time grows flowers
and trees
But my heart grows
more timid
in hope

and yet
Increased in
ardent yearning

creating a
melange of intense
pain
from which
there exists
no relief

Until your music
returns to
me.

-Haviva
(C) HVM 2019

The strain and ache of having you out of my life has been traumatic. It is like having all beauty and loveliness taken away and all color drained away, but worse. 

The most important thing to me is to please you.

I feel very romantic toward you, but I would never try and be more than you want. I respect you and would never jeopardize being able to know you. 

You and my son hold blessed places in my heart. I would give my everything and my life to save either of you.

Had to send my new electronic notebook back. It was not very good. I will wait for an actual lap top computer instead.

You never have to worry about anything to do with me. I am here to care about you and make your life happy, if I can, if you want. I do not force myself on people; that isn't me, but that awful man yelled at me as if I were being pushy. I am not pushy, unless I am protecting someone from harm. I would walk through fire for you. I would not think twice about it.

Tried to catch up with sleep today. Stressful situation with the HOA seems to have been bothering me. I have been losing my balance more lately. That strange attack against my renter by the gardener menacingly accusing my renter of being gay, because of the rainbow sticker on one of my cars some of the HOA had towed away as abandoned, offended and angered him. Someone else removed the one on my Ranger Rover that said, "what hurts one hurts all" and also had a rainbow. Both cars were towed away as abandoned after the HOA made me move my cars to the street. It has all been a part of the attack against me since the moment I came here. Mr. Corey and Bill Merget have been at the center of the attacks. It is my strong belief that Mr. Guasco, et al contacted them to harass me. Not only did they get to judges, etc, but here too. The plan has been to make me feel hated by everyone and die from the stress.

They are doing this all because I gave gifts and refused to blame him (my doctor) for all of this. I will never blame him and I will never stop loving him.

 If I die, I will die with the truth in my mind and love in my heart, but never with blame of him on my lips.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4154023/
Empty sella infor. and runny nose. I have that. I have hit my head twice, both times very hard.

Very sunny day today. At some point, maybe I will go for a walk by the ocean. My dog isn't much into it. Last time I took her she seemed either tired, or frightened and wouldn't budge. I carried her most of the way. I had one dog, when she got old, I would put her in a shopping cart that was left by the house and wheeled her around. She seemed to enjoy it. I had been told that she had belonged to a homeless woman and was found under someone's front porch. Such a cruel world. Everyone should have food and a place to live and feel safe, even doggies and cats.

Sometimes I don't feel like I belong anywhere. During this thing it really seemed that way, with everyone screaming at me and saying awful things about me that weren't true. Then they managed to even get the people in this complex to join in. It was obvious. Many were cold and actually strangely cruel from the start. I was baffled, but I had already been treated so badly by the people running the show with the faux legal thing, that I had been preconditioned. Someone wanted to take their anger out on me, so it was done. I knew I did nothing wrong, so I figured I was a scapegoat. How very odd. Then to be told I wasn't liked by you and the thing could last forever, was a very unkind parting blow. There is something very evil and twisted about people who can do that, like the (former) security guard, now janitor, who would have me followed around and would never let me even let me rest on a bench without telling me to leave. Even after my surgery, he would not let me sit on a bench to wait for a ride home. That place is under the control of some strange, cruel people. It's why I worry about you. They are predators.
Stay safe. Thanks for always being helpful and trying to make things okay for me. I have always understand subtleties, but not always right away.  You are very wise. The fact that you have always cared to help to make me understand has been a great help against despair. Maybe it is wishful thinking, but sometimes my heart will start beating hard and I get breathless and I think you are wishing me well. I get that way when thinking about you too. I always felt a close connection to you. I ask for your safety each night and for my love to be sent to you. I know I am heard.

When I think of you, my heart beats so hard and I breathe so fast, that I wonder if I will have enough of everything left
if I get to see you.

It scares me that I could die of love before I even see you.

Can you fix my heart?

"What is it about love that makes us so stupid?"
-"Under the Tuscan Sun"

I know I am writing to myself, but I miss you so much, I need to pretend I am talking to you.

I hope I haven't done anything to make you upset with me, I worry about you and it makes me try and figure things out. This has been a long, horrible wait. All I can do is pray. I know I run the chance that you don't remember me, or you just could not  give a crap, but my hope and faith feel so strong. I think about the amount of time left and it makes me so sad. I keep thinking about what I will do at the end, if you aren't there and I never see you again. I do think I will go wandering and wait out my time. Always with you in my heart and mind.

Watching Wanda Sykes on Netflicks. Funny!

Hi!
Just wanted to connect. I don't know if this looks ok, but it is about as good as my face does. Certain factors come into play like being perpetually tired and rather sad and beaten up, but I hang in there.
Hugs!

I purposely moved far away so I would not be tempted to take a look once in awhile. My aching is just as awful anywhere I go.

I write my thoughts to stay alive and as my prayers to you.

I am sorry for any mistakes I made.  I did everything purely from good intentions and an honest heart. Please don't ever be upset with me, it would devastate me.

No matter what my heart says to me, maybe you don't want to know me as much as I want to know you.
All I can do is hope.

I don't ever want to lose you again, no matter how I can know you.

I wish I could hold you in my arms and take away your pain.  I would kiss your brow and hold you tightly and never let you go.

When I think of you, all that comes to mind is love.

I have been in mourning for a long time.  Sometimes I barely feel alive.

You are happiness, joy and life to me.

Started watching, "What Dreams May Come". I may stop, if I cry too much.

It makes me miss you even more.

You know, of course, that I never did anything wrong, except go picket at SSF K for my civil rights (since the other security guard in charge wrote a letter saying I did something inappropriate to...but of course, that is not me. I don't do things like that. ) He said neither he, nor you had to tell me what I had done. How about nothing? That place is crazy. They allow a team of terrorists to attack people. What is that all about?

The weasel came out and said I had to leave, or he would call the Police. I left, but he called the Police anyway and he and that awful man put their heads together and made up contempt charges.

That is why I went to jail. I was never given a chance. They stuck me with C.S. to make it look like I had an attorney. He did nothing. They all knew it was a game, but I didn't. C.S. wanted me to blame you. I guess it pissed them off that I did not.

It angers me because they have obviously gotten certain people here involved too, so every once in awhile they harass me with stupid crap. It's absurd.

It is why I get worried about you, because I feel I have been used as a distraction from the real issue.

They tormented and terrorized me. They are disgusting people.

Thinking about you. Have a lovely lunch. I wish I were there. I would love to work with you.

I am still looking at places to live in Oregon, a place without an HOA. It would be nice to have the extra money. I just have to consider my mother. Her husband is in his 90's and she says she has a hard time getting him to his appointments, because it is hard to get him in and out of the car. She doesn't like to have a service do it, since it is expensive. I wish I hadn't moved so far away, I just did it out in a rush. I should be there to help her.  It was during a difficult time. I ran away, basically. I miss my house. It was so connected to my family, since they built it. I am trying to stay upbeat, but it is hard. If people in this complex were more friendly, it would be nicer, but they were mean from the moment they met me. I think they may have been instructed to be that way....but the woman next door brought me the books and asked about having some wine while sitting outside. It was nice, but I am leery about getting too friendly. I would get into this mess and I am too ashamed.

My renter had to go work, so he used my car. It is more his than mine. I never go out.
I spoke with my mother this morning, since it is her birthday. I am always nervous, because she usually has a lot of complaints, but this morning was different, so that was nice. She told me that the gardening shoes I sent her came just in time, because hers were worn out. She said they were just a bit big. It is annoying because my brother never sends her anything, so I put his name on things too. I don't want her to think anyone is forgetting her she had a hard life growing up. Her mother wanted to have fun, so she foisted my mother off on relatives, but her father said he didn't want her, but she worshipped anyway. I met him only one time. He was an obnoxious Florida racist. I had always thought he was dead. He never did anything for my mother. I take that all into consideration when my mother is not too pleasant. She is a product of her upbringing....aren't we all...
I guess we either become like the people who raise us, or the opposite. I am the opposite. I love people and feel sorry for them, if they are sad, or in need. Often it makes me a sucker, but I would rather be taken as a fool, than be somone who hurts people. I will never need redemption for that at least.

It is ironic that I am painted as a bad person during this whole thing; I could never purposely hurt anyone, yet I hear ugly things directed my way since this thing started. Other people don't mind being cruel. At least I know who I am, I have no worries that way. Those people who attack, though, I don't know how they live with themselves.

Have a lovely day.

I told the HOA pres that if that threatening man comes around again, I will file a restraining order against him. That pres. seeming to defend that gardener. He was trying to make it sound like my phone call to him was harassment. You just know he is going to use my situation against me. But, it will not be me filing it; it would be my renter.

I wish you would call them and tell them you are an owner and tell them to leave me alone. They already lied and had my cars towed saying they were abandoned, when they knew they were not.

They are total a-holes here. Someone from my situation got to them. You know, the three predators...? (Or more)

I have given many places an earful about the (you know) situation to make sure you are safe. However you think of me, I am going to keep you safe.

I hope the person who needed revenge against me is happy that I have lived through Hell.  Some people are sickos.

I can hardly wait until I can give you half my home.

I have been sad and confused. But never lost faith in you. Sending love and hugs.

Please forgive my agitation. I have just been going through a difficult time. It feels like no one cares what happens to me and what is going on with you. I keep wondering how such cruelty is allowed to exist. It tears me up.
I think you have forgotten me and moved on. That is what they wanted to have happen....maybe you did too.
I would have been happy just knowing you.

Life was so fun for a little bit. You made it so lovely.

Be safe.

I am just so unbelievably sad.

Ever think how great life would be if cruel people did not exist?

I am like Alice in a very cruel Wonderland.

I think I am going to lose the car that was towed away. The man who has the tow place has been so kind and patient with me. I feel like I am taking advantage. 

If I knew you would be happy to see me at the end, I could endure anything.

But now, I feel like Schrodinger's cat, only I don't know what I will find when (if) I am let out of the box. I know it is my own doing, being in the box, to some degree, not going anywhere, or actually enjoying life, but it is how I want it, because I feel like people are different and I don't want to know them. I loved you even when I didn't understand what was going on, but you were there for me when it was important. The other things were not you, even if you did them.
I believe in you, no matter what.

Knowing you was like finding an oasis and peace and love and joy; everything that made life lovely. Every emotion that made one feel like they could do the impossible, like they found the warm comfort of home. It felt so natural being with you. It felt safe. I did not believe the bad parts, because I knew you could never really want to hurt me. I know that certain circumstances create situations of which we must endure, but losing you was like losing something so essential to life that it has been crippling without it.
Losing you was as sudden to me as a car crash, and instead of being cared for, was left to scrape myself off the pavement and try and heal myself, with people coming along and excoriating me and treating me as if I were the most hated in the world. People in law who should be trusted, were not trustworthy, because truth didn't stand up for me and make them stop hurting me, over and over again and then planting the seed of hopelessness and despair in me as a "parting gift."

I have been adrift.

Maybe you have already forgotten me, maybe not.

This has not been what anyone has described as a waiting period, it has been much longer and with cruel attacks. But I hold you in my heart, it's just that my heart hurts so much, because no matter how much I try and be alone with my pain, cruelty makes it's appearance one way, or another. 

Just have a happy life and be well. I wish I could celebrate your birthday. It means a lot to me. That is why I risked trouble to bring gifts that time so long ago. It feels terrible not knowing how you are doing.

Do you remember me at all? I know you remember everything, but maybe you decided to forget, since I am a part of a bad time anyone would want to forget.

I don't think I can live through another year of this. Right now I feel so down, I can barely stand it.

Please let me know if you not interested in seeing me again, just let me know and you will never see me again. I give you my word. I just need this stopped so I can see what I will do next. This is killing me as is, I know you would not want to have me harmed further.
Love does not want to ever annoy the one they love.  It means i want your happiness.

A small sign would lift me up immensely.

Another year will be absolute torture.

And you probably don't even remember who I am.

Another year of heartache and suspense is so terrible.  I feel as if it will kill me.

Having tea and Danish cookies. Warming on a cold day.
Missing you.

I know it is silly to think about, but in the movie, "The Holiday" when Amanda thought she would home early, what would she have done with the dog? Let it starve?  Also, would she have imposed herself on Iris' vacation? Amanda was obviously pretty self-centered. Of course her driver was a complete a-hole too.
Iris was already kind and caring.
They both changed a lot and found love in the end. Sweet. I like happy endings to movies, so those recommendations were especially good for me.

You know I could talk to you all night and be fascinated by you. I like saying silly things things to you, but also about other things. ( the surgery books, etc) You made me feel like I was floating and so happy.

I would love to walk around Paris and Prague. What beautiful cities!

I love to walk. Even while on chemo I walked all over Monterey. I wore out my friend.

I will come alive shortly in the future...and walk. I didn't want to enjoy life while under this thing. When I know what is happening then I will figure out what to do.

If I cannot see you again, I will just wander.

Watching a Youtube video on Taiwan street food. They make some great looking food and so inexpensive!
A person could live very well there on retirement. I also heard Portugal is nice and inexpensive too.
I just like to think about things like that.

Had I known I would not be able to see you for so long, I would not have

I am ready to laugh again and forget the bad.

Don't you EVER feel sad, or alone, or lost without calling me. Just don't okay?

Each day, I feel frightened. I know it is my lack of connection, but too many odd things have happened.
Let me see you at least once again.

I just want to take care of you and make you feel loved. That is all I will ever want.
I miss you so much.

I just want to enjoy life....by knowing you.

I loved being around you so very much.

The world is too full of ugliness. I want

some real beauty, I want to see you.

They want me away to work on you. They melded two thoughts of what this was, so they could keep (their) options open. That is why that horrible man said he could keep it going forever, as long as HE thinks I want a relationship with you.  He is trying to foist someone on you, is what I think. Then they will take you for what you have and give you a "stroke" and that will be the end of you.
It scares me no end. I always wish I knew you were safe. Each day that goes by I wonder how you are.  Please don't let them hurt you.

I miss you.
I suppose you know that...

I have been taking ALA on a regular basis plus a probiotic that is widely encompassing a large variety of  probiotic types. It is good for immune health as well as internal and external fungal issues thst could lead to heart and brain infections.  I am noticing that my right leg that had the red orange peel skin as look more normal.  I have also been elevating my legs. I am going to venture out and do more walking. I have been in a funk, as you know. I have another your to go with a wait, but I wish it were shorter. It especially makes me agitated when that awful man leaves his threats hanging over me. That is unethical and must be illegal. They don't want me to know you...it is clearly obvious.

Have a sweet weekend!
It looks beautiful out, wish you were here!

So, basically they want my life to be miserable. It isnt good enough for "them" to restrain me, but life is supposed to be difficult too.
Real great people involved in this....
I would not trust any of them as far as I could carry them all on my back at one time.
Why are they so strange?
I have to go through this for another year. I didn't even renew my driver license...

Really, if you don't want to see me at all again, just tell me. I am not pushy. I would sell my home and be gone.

I will still carry you in my heart.

Hi! Good morning! I hope you enjoy your day!
I will have you on my mind and wishing you very well!
Hugs!

I didn't sleep at all. I have been so wound up. All kinds of things have cropped up all at once.
I got something else for my mother for a gift basket that didn't have all the sweets in it, but it won't arrive until 8 days later.

I looked at my orders and I think Amazon sent my mother the wrong food basket. I wanted savory, not sweet. I thought they were all crackers, etc, which is why I got cheese to go with it. Ugh! She said she doesn't eat candy, so this basket has quite a lot of choc etc. I don't know how the mistake happened.